The Shinbone Star advised readers yesterday that it’s too early to call for Donald Trump’s impeachment, even after Loose Lips decided to spill classified secrets to the Russians. Well, it’s a new day. Let the impeachment proceedings begin!
It’s been just four months into Trump’s apprenticeship as Leader of the Free World, and Americans are tired. They just want a day without a crisis. The people in Trump’s administration who speak on behalf of the president need time to go to rehab and collect what’s left of their dignity, as they are clearly drunk and mumbling nonsense at press briefings. Men with outstanding records of service to this country are relegated to clean-up duty. Trump’s Cabinet needs to go back to IKEA and his chief political adviser needs to crawl back under his rock.
This week has been a head-spinner, and it’s just Wednesday. Thanks to the real news media, we learn Trump has been boasting to the Russians about the United States intelligence capability and revealing international secrets. Then Trump threatens his fired FBI chief, Jim Comey, with tapes from a dinner conversation when Trump inappropriately asked for Comey’s undying loyalty and his first-born son. Then Comey reveals a memo he penned after that ill-fated dinner with the facts about what really happened: Namely, Trump attempted to interfere with the FBI investigation of also fired former national security adviser, Mike Flynn.
Notably, Flynn is under investigation for illegal dealings with Russia and Turkey. So who did Trump invite to the White House this week? That’s right, Russia and Turkey. The man should be impeached for his bad timing alone.
“We need someone who knows the meaning of confidential and classified information,” former candidate Trump once shouted from the podium. Apparently we still need someone who knows the meaning of confidential and classified. A little class and moral integrity would be nice, too.
Las Vegas odds-makers put Trump’s chance of impeachment at 60 percent, and that was before the leak of the Comey memo. Mr. Not-My-President, isn’t it time for your Grand Exit?
Frankly, 70-year-old man-baby Trump is crazy-scary. The highly respected Public Policy Polling this week announced Trump’s disapproval rate at a historic low of 40 percent, while 54 percent disapprove. Some 51 percent of Americans think he’s a liar, while 55 percent graciously think he is just “not being honest.” A majority, 53 percent, wish Barack Obama was still president instead of Trump. Hell, more people wish actor and decent human being Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, a former professional wrestler, was president instead of Trump, the pollster reports.
As a student of theater, drama and snake-oil peddling, Trump should know there are many historical political examples to follow for a quick exit. Okay, he’s basically ignorant of history, but the rest of us know Gen. Douglas MacArthur became legend when he left the Philippines in stormy seas in a tiny PT boat, and from the safety of Australia announced, “I will return.” Richard “You Don’t Have Nixon to Kick Around Anymore” Nixon went on television live to announce to the nation that he was not a quitter, then resigned as president rather than face impeachment.
How about that other political figure, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Surely Trump has heard of Arnold. He did some movies and tried to resuscitate a vacuous reality show, but the governor will always be immortalized as the first-ever politician to say, “Hasta la vista, baby.” And got great ratings for it.
Trump made quite a Grand Entrance at the Republican National Convention when he accepted the party nomination. Cue the drama: Trump enters the hall from stage left, a silhouette against a giant blue screen. The music plays. It’s an anthem, “We Are the Champions by Queen.” The crowd goes wild as he steps to the front of the stage, clapping for himself. He speaks: “We’re going to win, we’re going to win so big.”
Well, we didn’t win. Instead of a closer we got a loser. Trump violated the Constitution the first day on the job, when his hotels began raking in financial payments from foreign governments. He insulted our allies. He sent scientists and teachers to concentration camps (or was that Cambodia? Same thing.) The reputation of this country will take years to rebuild. And the next president will have to clean house of Trump’s tainted policies and environmental deregulation and undo his executive orders, all 1,539 of them.
At this point, the only reasonable choice is a special commission or special investigator. Same difference, but a special investigator can probably do it faster, and with less scheduling conflicts. We have no faith in Trump, but we do have faith that Trump’s lawyers and marketing people can cook up a Grand Exit. Better yet, let loose the hounds of an independent investigator and lock him up. We’ll be happy to name the next federal prison the Trump Hotel.