A while back I realized i was being inundated with advertisements for male enhancement products seemingly everywhere except NPR. Then it hit me, “Holy fuck! I’m in a target demographic for men with erectile dysfunction!”
All day I hear the the “Big Hurt,” retired baseball star Frank Thomas, tell random strangers about how great life is now that he’s back to being Daddy Longstroke. There’s another where the opening image is a work boot smashing two little of mounds of dirt flat while a pale imitation of Sam Elliott drawls in voiceover, “We have less testosterone than our grandfathers!”
Come to think of it, it’s the same kind of voice in those Duluth Trading clothing ads, which is the main reason I’ll never buy shit from them:
Then there’s the one where the young guy tells you how his limp dick saved his life and how Doctor Dad helped him regain his manhood, and now they’ll sell you their treatment. I always imagine the Dad grinning into the camera with a wink and a thumbs up. One commercial ends with the ersatz Sam Elliott swearing, “ . . . you’ll rule in the bedroom!”
Gone are the days where a lovely older couple sat side by side in separate bathtubs . . . outside . . . in the woods. Never quite got that, but now it ain’t about subtlety, it’s take this pill and reclaim your rightful place at the head of the pack.
Damn, is THIS how America got to Trump, by thinking with the wrong head?
I saw the piece above featuring New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady on “Saturday Night Live,” and it spurred these thoughts. Now there’s a guy who I bet would wear a MAGA hat.