Okay, we admit it, we don’t quite know who to root for this time

While harried Shinbone Star staffers run around the newsroom trying to sort out the confusion, we wanted our readers to know the essential facts, that famed chickenhawk National Security Adviser John Bolton has just been shit-canned by none other than Cadet Bone Spurs himself.

It’s hard to know if this is a plus or a minus for the banana republic formerly known as the good old U.S. of A. Ordinarily we’d say the world can’t go wrong by being rid of Bolton, but when you consider just who it was doing the firing — again reportedly by tweet — it certainly gives one pause.

Just when we were gearing up for Trump to fire the head of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration for daring to contradict the president’s bogus weather forecasts, it’s Bolton who draws the black bean instead.

So, readers, help us out here, do we cheer or do we fear? We know you’re looking to us for answers and that we’re failing miserably to provide any, but we’re so confused!

Stay tuned to The Shinbone Star for all the latest developments while our crack team of national security analysts tries to sort this one out.

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3 thoughts on “Okay, we admit it, we don’t quite know who to root for this time

  1. Probably, we cheer. Trump is all talk – he doesn’t want an actual war. Bolton, on the other hand, does. Interesting how two men who dodged the draft during Vietnam are so eager to use war (or threat of war) as a political tool. (“For the worst of men must fight, And the best of men must die.”) Of course, that wasn’t why Trlump fired Bolton. Bolton didn’t flatter enough, suck up enough. It’s hard on the rest on the world, admittedly. Bolton was predictable. Trump? If it makes him money… but otherwise, who knows what idiocy he’ll try? Bolton is the bad guy in a good thriller. Trump is the evil clown. So, maybe we don’t cheer but challenge the Republicans at every level – state house, governship, federal government, and hope we can get rid of them.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I’ve heard two versions of this- one is that Bolton was fired for telling Donnie that inviting the Taliban for a visit during 9/11 was a terrible idea. The other is that he was fired for being too much of a war hawk for Donnie’s taste. I’ve also heard that Bolton offered to resign, was told “we’ll talk about it tomorrow”, and was summarily fired by Tweet the next day.

    I’m most concerned about who will replace him. My money is on Joe Arpaio.

    Liked by 1 person

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